The Grateful Jaguar

And an unexpected connection to my beautiful daughter Melody.

I got a tattoo yesterday that was mixed with some of Chloe's ashes.

I wanted to honour her and her momma Cindy.

Chloe was born on December 16, 2003.

So why, did I have December 16, 2004 tattoo'd on me?

Because, last year, a grieving little sister got a tattoo to honour her big sister.

And she made a mistake on Chloe's birthdate and got 2004 instead.

Now Mel and I have something special shared between us for the rest of our lives.

And Chloe has something to look down and laugh at.

I'd love to share the story behind the jaguar.

Last year I was generously invited to a healing retreat in Costa Rica, put on by the incredible Mary Rondeau and her team at the Wholeness Center.

I can think of no better experience if you're looking to heal, find peace and understand yourself a little better. Thank you Mary ♥️

During the opening of the event we were asked to write a word to state a wish or intention for the week.

I wrote, "Chloe". My goal was to start to heal and to feel connected to my little girl.

During that week we participated in a traditional sweat lodge ceremony.

The Shaman explained to us that in this part of the world, the jaguar is the apex predator.

When the jaguar is in the jungle and is confronted with something unknown or unexpected (or even a known threat), it doesn't run.

It stands and faces it.

He told us that when we're in the sweat lodge, we'll be confronted with the unexpected and unknown.

And we have a choice.

We can leave or we can face it.

He encouraged us to "Be the jaguar".

During the ceremony, when things were the most intense I whispered to myself over and over, "Be the jaguar".

At the end of the week, during our closing rituals, we were asked to flip the board over and write something that captured the spirt of our head and heart.

I was feeling profoundly grateful for the experience, the new friends and the connection I felt to Chloe.

Without thinking much about it, I picked up a marker and wrote, "Grateful Jaguar".

This tattoo is a reminder that as I navigate grief, and the rest of my life, I'll be confronted with experiences that are profoundly difficult.

When I do, I'll stiffen my spine, square my shoulder and like the jaguar, face it.

What's a symbol or reminder in your life that helps you find strength during challenging times? I'd love to hear the story behind it ♥️

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